To the Ones Who Never Quite Fit the Mould

 “Fitting in is a short-term strategy. Standing out pays off in the long run.”

— Seth Godin

For the longest time, I thought something was wrong with me because I didn't fit in among people. Now I see that not fitting in was my superpower all along. As a kid, I didn't get along with many people and mostly kept to myself—mostly because I was too quiet. For me, small talk was, and sometimes still is, difficult.

After finishing 8th grade (middle school), I was completely lost in friendships and my social life. However, I met a few new friends in 9th grade. That changed when I found voices like Tam Kaur—soft yet strong reminders that uniqueness isn’t something to hide. Her videos opened my eyes to the quiet power of self-respect and emotional honesty. I also met a few extraordinary friends along the way—people who didn’t just tolerate being different, they thrived in it. Watching them helped me accept parts of myself I used to shrink down. I began embracing my individuality after meeting these awesome angels and many mentors. Eventually, I realised I didn’t want to be part of every group—just the right ones. And I’d rather be misunderstood than unreal.

Fitting in felt like suffocating into a mould never meant for me. It was conditional, exhausting, and oddly lonely. Belonging, on the other hand, feels like coming home. It doesn’t demand that I change; it embraces who I am. Belonging means being around people or in spaces where your weirdness isn’t just accepted—it’s celebrated. You’re not constantly editing yourself in your head. You just are.

Fitting in is fundamentally about survival. Belonging is about being seen. I lost a few friends along the way—people who didn’t quite understand my growth or drifted away when I stopped shrinking myself to fit in. It hurt at first. But in hindsight, it made space for something better.

As I became more myself, I started attracting people who genuinely got me—those who didn’t just enter my life, but truly became part of it. My friendships grew deeper and more authentic. I no longer felt like I had to explain or prove myself. I just had to be.

With that shift, my confidence quietly bloomed. I wasn’t trying to impress anymore—I was trying to express. And in doing so, everything started making more sense. My goals became clearer. My voice became stronger. The road ahead, once unclear because of my self-doubt, now feels in harmony with my true self. Now, I value a network built on quality over quantity.

In the past, I relied on the approval of others to feel validated, which made me believe I needed more friends to be confident and fit in. Over time, I learned to reflect more deeply on my thoughts and feelings instead.

You don’t need to have it all figured out. Here are a few small shifts that helped me feel more like myself:

• I stopped chasing approval and started chasing alignment.
• I chose quiet over noise, even when it made me feel left out.
• I reminded myself daily that I don’t need to be understood by everyone.

Maybe you weren’t made to fit in.

Maybe you were meant to build the space others will one day belong to.

Quick reminder:

“If you’ve ever felt like you’re too different to be understood, maybe you’re just ahead of your time. Or maybe, you were meant to create your circle instead of sitting at someone else’s.”